Banking on Capturing Youth Will Eventually Bankrupt You

The House Always Wins, you know? And the house is death.

Recently a PR email landed in my inbox that I wasn’t sure was actually real or not: Neutrogena’s Collagen Bank.

I have gotten plenty of much more bizarre beauty emails, to be honest, but the cringe perfection of such a product name felt so on-the-nose on society’s fixation with forever youth that I was initially hoping it was made up. It also felt so per…